US stance on Iran a 'load of crap'

Washington (T2N2) A senior US diplomat has claimed that the Bush administration's threat to invoke sanctions against Iran for alleged nuclear activity is just a "load of crap".

Speaking on condition of anonymity, the US State Department official also told T2N2 that chances of a military showdown with Iran were "absolutely zero".

The comments came ahead of Friday's deadline set by the UN Security Council for Tehran to freeze uranium enrichment work as a confidence-building measure.

"With President George W Bush already facing a slide in popularity over the fiasco in Iraq, do you think he will dare to even think of a repeat in Iran."

According to the official, the best friends of both of the President's daughters are from Tehran. Plus, Bush loves Iranian food and has many friends from the country.

"Bush has several icecream buddies in Iran. There's no chance he will actually jeopardize their friendship for some rotten nuclear activity which is unlikely to bear fruit anyway.

"So why the posturing? As a world superpower, the US needs to assert its presence and bully other countries. It's only bark, no bite."

Meanwhile, reports of several Iranian restaurants in the US capital pulling down their shutters have sent White House officials into a tizzy. (T2N2)

UK town secures itself after terror threat

London (T2N2) Following reports of an al-Qaeda threat, the residents of Wousehode, 40 miles south of the capital, are trying their best to secure their town from any terror attack.

Over the past week, roads leading to the town were painstakingly "wiped" out to prevent vehicles from coming in. Guards have been posted at every nook and corner and every registered citizen has been provided with guns to protect themselves, official sources said.

The measures were taken after an anonymous letter addressed to Wousehode mayor, Doug Heffernan, claimed that the al-Qaeda was preparing for a series of attacks on the nondescript town.

According to Heffernan, residents took matters into their own hands after Scotland Yard refused to pay any credence to the conspiracy theory.

Meanwhile, government sources said they will be looking into the incident.(T2N2)

Forget about Memory pills

New Delhi (T2N2) Goodbye memory pills. Indian scientists at the Memory Institute here have come up with 'Forget' - a pill that actually helps you forget incidents.

Stumped? Well, Raj Shekhar and his team of researchers say that people are eager to forget a lot of unhappy events in their life - the death of a loved one, a traumatic divorce or even the day your Board Exam results came through.

The pill works by forcing the consumer to briefly focus on a facet of the incident and then wipes it out completely from their memory. But what's in the wonder drug? Shekhar refuses to tell us - for now.

"We aren't ready to reveal the ingredients just yet. Foreign multinationals are ever ready to claim stuff invented or perfected by Indians as their own. Take basmati rice for example."

That may be true but will the global community accept a pill that could make incidents depicted in the Hollywood flick Fifty First Dates a lot more common.

The scientists are adopting a 'wait and watch' attitude preferring instead to continue with tests in control groups. But Shekhar promises to reveal more about the wonder pill by the end of this year.

Seems like we will have to take a memory pill to help us remember not to 'forget' about it. (T2N2)